mrscarstairs:

Gather round children, whilst I tell you a little story.
So I was watching Fullmetal Alchemist with my roommate, when I got thirsty and decided what the hell, Ima get myself a Coke. So I went down to the vending machine on our floor and swiped my card and pressed the button to vend the Coke. Well, TWO cokes popped out.
Weird right?
I looked around, wondering if I was on one of those punk’d shows, and grabbed both bottles. Suddenly, a loud thrumming came from the machine, and lo and behold, 6 MORE COKES CAME OUT.
After checking my debit card statement, I found that I was only charged for ONE coke. Feeling giddy but slightly guilty, I nabbed all 8 bottles of coke and went back to my room. After telling my roommate what happened, she decided to go back to the coke machine with me and see if only the Cokes are affected.
She bought two Sprites, and what the fuck do ya know, she got those damn Sprites, AS WELL AS 11 FREE COKES. 
This of course jammed the machine, and before I knew it, I was on my knees with my arm up the Coke machine, practically birthing these little fuckers. I even read off their names on their bottles as I handed them to my roommate. We also found a random Cherry Coke had popped out as well.
Behold our finished family. 19 cokes, 2 Sprites, and a Cherry Coke, all the result of a very overworked and confused Coke machine.

mrscarstairs:

Gather round children, whilst I tell you a little story.

So I was watching Fullmetal Alchemist with my roommate, when I got thirsty and decided what the hell, Ima get myself a Coke. So I went down to the vending machine on our floor and swiped my card and pressed the button to vend the Coke. Well, TWO cokes popped out.

Weird right?

I looked around, wondering if I was on one of those punk’d shows, and grabbed both bottles. Suddenly, a loud thrumming came from the machine, and lo and behold, 6 MORE COKES CAME OUT.

After checking my debit card statement, I found that I was only charged for ONE coke. Feeling giddy but slightly guilty, I nabbed all 8 bottles of coke and went back to my room. After telling my roommate what happened, she decided to go back to the coke machine with me and see if only the Cokes are affected.

She bought two Sprites, and what the fuck do ya know, she got those damn Sprites, AS WELL AS 11 FREE COKES. 

This of course jammed the machine, and before I knew it, I was on my knees with my arm up the Coke machine, practically birthing these little fuckers. I even read off their names on their bottles as I handed them to my roommate. We also found a random Cherry Coke had popped out as well.

Behold our finished family. 19 cokes, 2 Sprites, and a Cherry Coke, all the result of a very overworked and confused Coke machine.

ficsforsterek:

FICSFORSTEREK’S REALITY TV/TV SHOW FIC REC
Dancing With The Moon (2/2 | 10,882 | Rated E)

Dancing With The Stars AU. Stiles Stilinski, former child star, has been strong-armed into participating in a reality show by his agent in an attempt to raise his profile and actually get him some work as an adult. With champion dancer Laura Hale on his arm, Stiles might even stand a chance of going all the way. Their only obstacle (aside from Stiles’ complete inability to cha cha cha) is Lydia Martin and her professional partner—Laura’s brother, Derek.

The Dating Game (1/1 | 4,596 | Rated M)

Derek doesn’t exactly understand how he ended up as a contestant on a dating show. He knows that it started with a lot of whiskey and a late night phone call to his sister and mockery. Lots and lots of mockery, because Laura never lets anything go, no matter how old she gets.
(Because what the world really needs is more Omegaverse!dating show fic in it. Right?)

Big Star’s Little Star (1 work | 6,944 | Rated PG)

Stephen must be the human incarnation of the Devil because he’d asked Ally the question ‘Who does Daddy have a secret crush on?’
Stiles would’ve assumed that Ally had said something like, Batman or something but the answer was either Uncle Scott, Auntie Lydia, Curly Fries or Mister Derek. If it wasn’t prime time TV and if there weren’t any children in the audience he would’ve sworn.
"Right," he starts, because how do you answer something like this? There’s no right way to do it. Silently he congratulates himself on his pun making skills. "So it isn’t as bad as it sounds."
"Really?" Is the incredulous answer he gets.
"I resent that! Scott is my best friend and she’s seen me hug him and declare that I love him so that might be it, but that’s not really a secret. Lydia, I had a crush on in High School but that sort of died. I do love Curly Fries, they are the best food ever."
"And Derek?"
"Derek is…Derek." He answers lamely, resolutely not looking at the man in question. "I’ll think she’ll say Scott."
He hopes she says Scott.
She doesn’t.

The time Stiles and Scott “competed” for Allison’s love on a reality TV show (1/1 | 1,780 | Rated PG-13)

The thing is, Stiles has no interest whatsoever in going on a TV dating show. Deep down, in his heart of hearts — and publicly, to anyone who is foolish enough to bring up the topic — Stiles thinks it’s kind of pathetic. Because it’s all fake, for starters, like all “reality” TV is fake, but also he thinks the people who go on those shows are more interested in attention than love, so what’s the point? It’s like narcissistic masturbation with some television exhibitionism thrown in for good measure. And letting the entire nation — nay, the world — mock your lack of pick-up prowess? Noooo thank you.

The Chance To Come Through (3 works | complete | 7,569 | Rated PG)

Derek’s auditioning because Laura talked him into it, though he’s not sure a ballet dancer is really what a televised dance competition is looking for. Stiles is auditioning because it seemed like a fun thing to do with Scott on a Saturday morning, and maybe he’d get to dance with Comfort, his favorite female hip hop dancer. They both end up getting a lot more than they were looking for.(A So You Think You Can Dance AU.)

Heart To Heart (1/1 | 12,129 | Rated E) 

Stiles never expected to be one of the twenty-five men to compete over the bachelorette Cora’s heart in this season’s Heart to Heart and even if Cora likes him enough, he doubts he’ll manage to make her family like him well enough to let him stay. When he arrives at the mansion he realizes that it’s not so much Cora’s heart he wants to win as her brother’s…
-
The reality show no one asked for - with a twist

Out of the Frying Pan, Into The Fire (1/1 | 25,816 | Rated M)

Derek is the host of the popular Argent-run Dinner with Derek cooking show. Stiles is the one doing all the cooking. Derek would love to leave him to it and just go live with his sister and their goats on their tiny farm. That is not what happens.
Featuring hippie communes, goats, a couple kids, Kate Argent Warning for angst & past relationship, and new pack bonds. Plus food. Mmmmm… food…

Two Bros In The Know (1/1 | 28,904 | Rated E)

According to their fansite, Two Bros in the Know (or TBK, as they were referred to by those in the know) grew out of an idea Scott had their senior year of high school.
The truth was much less cinematic: Stiles wanted to impress Lydia Martin, and thought being a famous ghost hunter would do the trick. But it wasn’t until the summer before their senior year in college, during an epic tour of farmhouses in the Dakotas, that TBK’s popularity went through the roof. Thanks, in large part, to their “rivalry” with Natural, the show featuring real-life siblings Derek and Cora Hale, and their mission to debunk all the same kinds of places TBK said were haunted.
This is the story of how the TBK crew met the Hale crew, featuring a golden bromance, pranks, stress baking, pillow forts, an internet meme, homemade moonshine, ghostly apparitions, dramatic rescues, the plot of a Muppet Show special, and of course, true love.

All This Has Happened (1/1 | 10,769 | Rated M)

The thing is, most of it’s been done before. People competing for money, or love, or fame - it’s all boring, it’s all been done, has-been, seen before, who cares? Until some motherfucker finally realized - you know what’s really interesting?
Revenge.
Dystopian AU where fame is the name of the game. Sometimes revenge is the quickest way to the top, and Derek Hale has plenty to avenge - Stiles is just along for the ride.

Top Inker (1/1 | 2,898 | Rated PG)

Derek is a tattoo artist and contestant on the show Top Inker. Stiles is a canvas to be tattooed. An annoying, jittery canvas with a stupid tattoo idea.

ficsforsterek:

FICSFORSTEREK’S REALITY TV/TV SHOW FIC REC

Dancing With The Moon (2/2 | 10,882 | Rated E)

Dancing With The Stars AU. Stiles Stilinski, former child star, has been strong-armed into participating in a reality show by his agent in an attempt to raise his profile and actually get him some work as an adult. With champion dancer Laura Hale on his arm, Stiles might even stand a chance of going all the way. Their only obstacle (aside from Stiles’ complete inability to cha cha cha) is Lydia Martin and her professional partner—Laura’s brother, Derek.

The Dating Game (1/1 | 4,596 | Rated M)

Derek doesn’t exactly understand how he ended up as a contestant on a dating show. He knows that it started with a lot of whiskey and a late night phone call to his sister and mockery. Lots and lots of mockery, because Laura never lets anything go, no matter how old she gets.

(Because what the world really needs is more Omegaverse!dating show fic in it. Right?)

Big Star’s Little Star (1 work | 6,944 | Rated PG)

Stephen must be the human incarnation of the Devil because he’d asked Ally the question ‘Who does Daddy have a secret crush on?’

Stiles would’ve assumed that Ally had said something like, Batman or something but the answer was either Uncle Scott, Auntie Lydia, Curly Fries or Mister Derek. If it wasn’t prime time TV and if there weren’t any children in the audience he would’ve sworn.

"Right," he starts, because how do you answer something like this? There’s no right way to do it. Silently he congratulates himself on his pun making skills. "So it isn’t as bad as it sounds."

"Really?" Is the incredulous answer he gets.

"I resent that! Scott is my best friend and she’s seen me hug him and declare that I love him so that might be it, but that’s not really a secret. Lydia, I had a crush on in High School but that sort of died. I do love Curly Fries, they are the best food ever."

"And Derek?"

"Derek is…Derek." He answers lamely, resolutely not looking at the man in question. "I’ll think she’ll say Scott."

He hopes she says Scott.

She doesn’t.

The time Stiles and Scott “competed” for Allison’s love on a reality TV show (1/1 | 1,780 | Rated PG-13)

The thing is, Stiles has no interest whatsoever in going on a TV dating show. Deep down, in his heart of hearts — and publicly, to anyone who is foolish enough to bring up the topic — Stiles thinks it’s kind of pathetic. Because it’s all fake, for starters, like all “reality” TV is fake, but also he thinks the people who go on those shows are more interested in attention than love, so what’s the point? It’s like narcissistic masturbation with some television exhibitionism thrown in for good measure. And letting the entire nation — nay, the world — mock your lack of pick-up prowess? Noooo thank you.

The Chance To Come Through (3 works | complete | 7,569 | Rated PG)

Derek’s auditioning because Laura talked him into it, though he’s not sure a ballet dancer is really what a televised dance competition is looking for. Stiles is auditioning because it seemed like a fun thing to do with Scott on a Saturday morning, and maybe he’d get to dance with Comfort, his favorite female hip hop dancer. They both end up getting a lot more than they were looking for.
(A So You Think You Can Dance AU.)

Heart To Heart (1/1 | 12,129 | Rated E) 

Stiles never expected to be one of the twenty-five men to compete over the bachelorette Cora’s heart in this season’s Heart to Heart and even if Cora likes him enough, he doubts he’ll manage to make her family like him well enough to let him stay. When he arrives at the mansion he realizes that it’s not so much Cora’s heart he wants to win as her brother’s…

-

The reality show no one asked for - with a twist

Out of the Frying Pan, Into The Fire (1/1 | 25,816 | Rated M)

Derek is the host of the popular Argent-run Dinner with Derek cooking show. Stiles is the one doing all the cooking. Derek would love to leave him to it and just go live with his sister and their goats on their tiny farm. That is not what happens.

Featuring hippie communes, goats, a couple kids, Kate Argent Warning for angst & past relationship, and new pack bonds. Plus food. Mmmmm… food…

Two Bros In The Know (1/1 | 28,904 | Rated E)

According to their fansite, Two Bros in the Know (or TBK, as they were referred to by those in the know) grew out of an idea Scott had their senior year of high school.

The truth was much less cinematic: Stiles wanted to impress Lydia Martin, and thought being a famous ghost hunter would do the trick. But it wasn’t until the summer before their senior year in college, during an epic tour of farmhouses in the Dakotas, that TBK’s popularity went through the roof. Thanks, in large part, to their “rivalry” with Natural, the show featuring real-life siblings Derek and Cora Hale, and their mission to debunk all the same kinds of places TBK said were haunted.

This is the story of how the TBK crew met the Hale crew, featuring a golden bromance, pranks, stress baking, pillow forts, an internet meme, homemade moonshine, ghostly apparitions, dramatic rescues, the plot of a Muppet Show special, and of course, true love.

All This Has Happened (1/1 | 10,769 | Rated M)

The thing is, most of it’s been done before. People competing for money, or love, or fame - it’s all boring, it’s all been done, has-been, seen before, who cares? Until some motherfucker finally realized - you know what’s really interesting?

Revenge.

Dystopian AU where fame is the name of the game. Sometimes revenge is the quickest way to the top, and Derek Hale has plenty to avenge - Stiles is just along for the ride.

Top Inker (1/1 | 2,898 | Rated PG)

Derek is a tattoo artist and contestant on the show Top Inker. Stiles is a canvas to be tattooed. An annoying, jittery canvas with a stupid tattoo idea.

thebsdboys:

OK first you’re being a total dick right now,

thebsdboys:

OK first you’re being a total dick right now,

dyleon:

soulmate au where you can’t lie to your soulmate

OH MY GOD DEREK TRYING TO HIDE THE FACT THAT HE WAS OUT BUYING AN ENGAGEMENT RING AND STILES TAKING THE PISS

raptorific:

I see how it is. Rihanna can wear a shiny, completely transparent dress in public and everyone loves it, but when I did it, I was “wasting saran wrap” and “ruining Easter, Daniel.”

adamnsight:

Have you ever seen brown eyes in the sun? You don’t always notice it at first but you’ll see that ‘brown’ no longer describes them. They melt into golden rays, circling an eclipse. There’s nothing boring about brown eyes, not even when the later hours encroach; they just turn into a sunset of their own. 

boo-would222:

grizzlygains:

happyhalloweekes:

spoopy-shanin:

I’m not too late for the cute lil ghosts, right?

Of course you have to drag it and be amazed

THIS IS THE BEST ONE YET

THESE DRAG GHOSTS GIVE ME LIFE

boo-would222:

grizzlygains:

happyhalloweekes:

spoopy-shanin:

I’m not too late for the cute lil ghosts, right?

Of course you have to drag it and be amazed

THIS IS THE BEST ONE YET

THESE DRAG GHOSTS GIVE ME LIFE

afro-dominicano:

socialjusticekoolaid:

Whites riot over pumpkins in NH and Twitter turns it into epic lesson about Ferguson, aka The Best of #PumpkinFest, PT 1. #staywoke

in this week’s episode of shit black folks would get murdered or jailed with no trial for

brinabees:

Caitlin Stasey being a wonderful feminist role model on twitter.

hellish